was glad to be alive
whilst teetering on a brink and precipice.
Whilst climbing he had slipped,
then simply lost his grip,
thus realising it possible
to dislocate both hips.
He was no mountaineer,
now this of course was clear,
but persuaded by a thick and drunken mist,
so convincing him to climb,
how ridiculously sublime
the future lay beneath him
like a cavernous abyss.
He wracked his brains and thought
about the things that he'd been taught,
though was sure the manual gave no actual mention.
His straddled legs astride,
the gaping cavern wide;
he had no idea his legs could reach
the length of their extension!
He performed the perfect splits
as frost covered his lips,
the cold now setting his amazing posture.
He cried out but in vain,
as snow then turned to rain,
he was so relieved to hear the sound
of the air to sea helicopter!
The rescue now in place
what a picture was his face,
if only he could close his dangling limbs.
He feared they'd never close
as he looked out to his toes...
the helicopter crew men
had a job to get him in!
Poor Leonard Sindon-Smyth
unable now to drive
he travels in the back with windows down.
His chauffeur leads the way
and even now today,
you can see his feet protruding
as he's driven round the town!
